The miseducation of the bra

Bras, “over-the-shoulder-boulder-holders,” those things the majority of wearers cannot wait to take off at the end of their day yet cannot seem to completely be rid of. As someone with a larger bust, trust me—I get why bras have a bit of a mixed reception, but as a former expert fitter, I can’t help but think that this is due to the miseducation of bras.

My first retail job was working at a mom-and-pop bra shop in Long Island called Mary Lerner, where they specialize in fitting any and all busts, even offering custom alternations to ensure a perfect fit, with sizes ranging from 28AA to 48K. And yes, that’s a real size. Between pre-teens with their first bras, to finding the perfect undergarments for soon-to-be brides, fitting expecting mothers for nursing bras, and assisting mastectomy patients and elders for the utmost comfort, it was incredibly rewarding helping women of all stages of life to find their perfect bra.

It was also at this job that I realized a common thread between the majority of the women I encountered—they didn’t know their bra size, although they were sure they did. And if I were a gambler, I’d bet you don’t know yours either, but you think you do… Don’t you?

To double-check me, you’re going to need a sewing tape measurer and the ability to do some quick math. Take the tape and wrap it around your underbust at the top of your rib cage, which will be your band size, and then around the fullest part of your bust which is generally at your nips, to get your cup size. If you get an odd number when measuring your underbust, round up to the next even number, since bras only come in even band sizes (i.e. 32DD, 34D, 36C). To get the cup size, you would count up from the underbust number to the bust number, with each inch increasing the letter. 

If you’re not good at math (like me!), you can follow along with my measurements below as an example:

Underbust: 37in, but rounded up to 38in

Bust: 44in

Size: 38DDD

Now, remember those sizes I mentioned when talking about even band sizes—32DD, 34D, 36C? If you took the same bra in those three different sizes, they would all fit the same bust, making them what we call “sister sizes.” To get a sister size, you would either increase in the band, and decrease the cup size, or vice-versa depending on what you’re looking to achieve in the fit. Granted the most comfortable or flattering fit would be for the wearer to determine, and sizing may not always carry over between brands, but your measurement acts as the foundation for your bra size.

Now that you know how to get your size, you get to have the 90’s compilation try-on scene of your dreams with all the different types of styles and cuts, and of course colors! It’s time to begin building your “brarsenal,” so to speak. As you’re trying everything on, make note of the various features of the bra and how they feel on your body. As a general rule of thumb and to avoid annoying repetition, everything should feel comfortably snug: the band and closure, the cups and underwire (if it has one), the bra’s center gore (the space on the bra in between the cups) and the straps. 

When it comes to the band, you want it to feel secure without digging into your skin but also without slipping. The majority of the structure and support of the bra actually comes from its band, which is one of the many reasons why a proper fit is so important. If the closure is in the back, as it traditionally is, it will have a hook-and-eye closure with three rows of hooks. To start, you should be wearing your bra on loosest hook, and it starts to stretch out with wear, you’ll eventually move the hook in to the middle row, and then the tightest. This way you get the same secure fit throughout the life of the bra.

As for the cups, we’re looking to make sure that your breasts fill them without any gaping or spillage. We don’t want breast tissue trapped between the underwire, and we don’t want the cup cutting into your flesh and creating a “double-boob” situation. It should fit flush across your skin, with your breasts centered within the cup. Another rule of thumb incoming! To tell if they’re centered, take your thumb and place it along your collarbone, and where your pinky falls on your breast is where your nipple should fall. Don’t ask me how, but it works.

The center gore can look different on each bra, with some reaching up higher on your chest while others sit lower. It should sit flush along your sternum, feeling—you guessed it, not too tight and not too loose. If you have a fuller bust, sometimes you’ll find that the center gore pulls away from your bust altogether, to which I’d advise you avoid that bra. 

Straps are subjective, with some preferring looser while others like them as tight as possible. It comes as a surprise to most of those who prefer the latter that the straps only make up a small percentage of the overall support of a bra. But as another rule of thumb, the straps should be tightened to anywhere between 1-3 inches down from the tops of your shoulders. Some bras also have straps that are convertible, meaning that you can detach and re-attach them in a variety of ways: criss-cross, halter, etc. which can be a useful feature!

Okay, great so you kept all of that in mind and now you have a bra, and if everything went as planned, you’ve been wearing it for a few days and it’s going great! If you take away anything from what you’ve read, have it be this: wash your bras by hand. 

You don’t have to sit and scrub at it in the sink like in the medieval days; just wear it in the shower with you and wash it as you would your body—body soap is totally fine. Just remember to wash the inside too, rinse and wring it out, and leave it to air dry. Every time you toss your bra in the machine—especially the drier, its shelf life reduces by 25%, and we don’t want all that hard work finding it to go to waste! Save your coin, and your boobs, and the environment by washing by hand!

And with that, you’ve successfully completed a crash course on Bras 101. We really only scratched the surface with the basics here, but I have faith that you’ll figure out the rest. Or hey, it’s 2023 so you can always scrap it all and #freethenip, but I can sleep better knowing that I’ve done my part in facilitating the re-education of the bra.